I hosted a “women’s nite” this past weekend. This is something I do periodically and we always have a wonderful time. I was in a rather quiet mood Saturday night, so after everyone filled their plates with munchies and got settled onto our back porch, I just sat back to enjoy listening to the conversations.
Women are capable of carrying on multiple discussions at one time. There were eight of us and at one point I noticed we’d paired up and there were four separate topics being discussed. Even while conversing with my partner, I was still able to keep an ear chimed into what the other ladies were talking about.
As my brain registered the varying topics, I started laughing and pointed out to my women friends, how our gatherings have changed over the years. In our 20’s we had “girls nites”, where we’d usually go to a bar or a night club for drinks, to dance and check out the latest hunks. We’d usually close the place down.
In our 30’s we still did “girl’s nite” only now we had to be sure our husbands could watch the children and we usually met at a restaurant somewhere, although occasionally we’d go crazy and hit a club or local bar. The conversations usually centered on diaper rash, breast feeding, sex, play groups and our children’s various activities. The night would end fairly early, so we could either tuck the little ones in or just because we were too exhausted to stay out very late.
In our 40’s we had “ladies nite” and we almost always met at an upscale restaurant. Sometimes we’d go really crazy and catch a movie after our meal. During our meals, which usually included a couple of strong drinks, we talked about divorce, cheating husbands, being bored with our lives, troubles with our jobs, the angst of raising teenagers or the sorrow of suddenly having “empty nest” syndrome. We never seemed to want to go home, but our stamina wasn’t what it used to be so we usually parted company around 11p.m. or so.
In our 50’s, (my current group) we have lots of women’s gatherings and get-togethers, but every once in awhile we’ll have an evening at a friend’s house labeled “women’s nite”. We all bring food to share and the meet up never starts later than 7p.m. On occasion we play a game together, but normally we just sit around, relaxing, stuffing our faces and sharing the latest news. Our conversations seem to center on menopause, coping with grown children who have no respect for their parents, grandchildren, aches, pains, the latest in plastic surgery, fillers and Botox injections. We also enjoy telling ribald jokes, stories about our husband’s antics or discussing the joys of being unencumbered by a mate. Our finishing times vary from 10p.m. to midnight or so, depending on our medication regime, whether we still have to work full-time or our depression levels.
I can’t wait to see what happens in my 60’s, 70’s and 80’s. As long as there aren’t any red hats with purple clothing involved…I’ll be good!
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Thursday, September 2, 2010
COFFEE TIME PEOPLE WATCHING
There’s something very calming about going to a coffee house in the morning. I love the smell of the place as I walk in the door. I’m excited about my coffee choices and all the delightful ways in which I can enrich my coffee to fit my taste. It makes me feel a part of the human race to be standing there in line, waiting for my turn to present my order and start my day.
I visited Panera Bread a couple of mornings this week. Some of you may not think of Panera as a “coffeehouse”, but because I like a sweet pastry, of some sort, to go with my morning joe…I prefer their selection, to the rather limited selection at some of the more popular coffee places.
It was very interesting watching the “people of Panera” as they settled down for their morning treats. Some traveled in packs and you could tell by their attire they’d be headed to their jobs soon. A couple of caffeine infused business meetings, were taking place and a few solo corporate types floated in and out.
What I enjoyed most were the people who came to either work, read or merely wanted to get away from home, some with children in tow. The self-employed, unemployed, students or writers, tend to order coffee only and sit with their laptops open, staring at their screens, typing or scanning various websites. These are usually the 2-3 cups per stay people.
A few moms stopped in, deposited their children at tables with gooey breakfast sweets to keep them occupied, while the mothers sighed with relief as they took their first sip of “get me through the day stimulation.”
Men and women who came, as I did, merely to get out of the house for a bit and mingle with other morning people, brought either books, magazines or newspapers to read. I enjoyed watching the routines of some of these folks. Get coffee, get bagel, sit at table, spread cream cheese on bagel, adjust placement of food and drink articles on table, open reading material, take one look around dining area and finally begin perusing brain material.
Ahhhh, sweet nectar of a caffeine-aholic...I love spending time with my people. See you again soon!
I visited Panera Bread a couple of mornings this week. Some of you may not think of Panera as a “coffeehouse”, but because I like a sweet pastry, of some sort, to go with my morning joe…I prefer their selection, to the rather limited selection at some of the more popular coffee places.
It was very interesting watching the “people of Panera” as they settled down for their morning treats. Some traveled in packs and you could tell by their attire they’d be headed to their jobs soon. A couple of caffeine infused business meetings, were taking place and a few solo corporate types floated in and out.
What I enjoyed most were the people who came to either work, read or merely wanted to get away from home, some with children in tow. The self-employed, unemployed, students or writers, tend to order coffee only and sit with their laptops open, staring at their screens, typing or scanning various websites. These are usually the 2-3 cups per stay people.
A few moms stopped in, deposited their children at tables with gooey breakfast sweets to keep them occupied, while the mothers sighed with relief as they took their first sip of “get me through the day stimulation.”
Men and women who came, as I did, merely to get out of the house for a bit and mingle with other morning people, brought either books, magazines or newspapers to read. I enjoyed watching the routines of some of these folks. Get coffee, get bagel, sit at table, spread cream cheese on bagel, adjust placement of food and drink articles on table, open reading material, take one look around dining area and finally begin perusing brain material.
Ahhhh, sweet nectar of a caffeine-aholic...I love spending time with my people. See you again soon!
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
ONCE A PARENT...ALWAYS A PARENT
Do we ever stop being parents? I have two children, a son and a daughter. My son lives in Mountain City, TN and is in his 30’s…and I still worry about him periodically. My Daughter though, is my main source of concern. She is turning 23 next week and she has been very sick for the last couple of days. I, of course, being Mom, have lost sleep over her illness. Every horrible scenario, I could possibly think of, rushed through my head last night, while I was trying desperately to shut off my brain and snooze.
She’s always had stomach issues. We’ve been to doctor after doctor and had test after test run, but no one ever finds a significant reason for her upset tummies. Yesterday she couldn’t keep anything in her system and today she is still suffering.
I automatically go into “nurse mom” mode when she is ill: making toast, tea, hot pads for her back, taking her temperature, and cool compresses for her forehead. I’ll do anything to try to make her more comfortable.
The hardest part is the worrying though. I wonder if anyone has ever done a survey to see if people who never have children live longer lives? I have several very good friends, who are suffering through all sorts of situations with their grown children. I’ve come to the conclusion, that no matter what their age…our kids are our kids and we will always be their parents.
I just wish I could get a decent night’s sleep and stop this infernal anxiety, which always seems to settle in the pit of stomach, whenever I feel either of my children’s worlds are threatened in anyway.
Regardless, I have to admit, I wouldn’t change the role of motherhood for anything in the world. Both of my children have been a blessing from the day they were born and they continue to bless me every day. I’ll deal with my daughter’s present problem and then move on to the next one. It seems never ending, but so is my love for her!
She’s always had stomach issues. We’ve been to doctor after doctor and had test after test run, but no one ever finds a significant reason for her upset tummies. Yesterday she couldn’t keep anything in her system and today she is still suffering.
I automatically go into “nurse mom” mode when she is ill: making toast, tea, hot pads for her back, taking her temperature, and cool compresses for her forehead. I’ll do anything to try to make her more comfortable.
The hardest part is the worrying though. I wonder if anyone has ever done a survey to see if people who never have children live longer lives? I have several very good friends, who are suffering through all sorts of situations with their grown children. I’ve come to the conclusion, that no matter what their age…our kids are our kids and we will always be their parents.
I just wish I could get a decent night’s sleep and stop this infernal anxiety, which always seems to settle in the pit of stomach, whenever I feel either of my children’s worlds are threatened in anyway.
Regardless, I have to admit, I wouldn’t change the role of motherhood for anything in the world. Both of my children have been a blessing from the day they were born and they continue to bless me every day. I’ll deal with my daughter’s present problem and then move on to the next one. It seems never ending, but so is my love for her!
Monday, August 23, 2010
BROTHERLY LOVE
I don't believe an accident of birth makes people sisters or brothers. It makes them siblings, gives them mutuality of parentage. Sisterhood and brotherhood is a condition people have to work at.
-- Maya Angelou
I love this quote, especially because my brothers and I didn’t grow up together. Due to an alcoholic father, we were scattered about by Social Services, in different homes around our community. We are all four years apart, so our age discrepancies also played a big part in our not feeling close to one another. We were merely “siblings” growing up, but as we age…as we each have passed the 50 year old mark, I find that we are reaching out to each other, in a way we never did before.
I was lucky enough to get to spend time with all four of my brothers this past weekend. We gathered for a cookout, at one of the twins homes, in Myrtle Beach. They seem to know so much more about each other’s lives than I do. It was fun to sit and listen to them reminisce and learn more about the way in which they have grown and changed through the years.
After just losing my job…the closeness of this family reunion warmed my heart and brought me pure joy. The graying hair, the furrowed brows and deep wrinkles, the extra weight we’ve all gained through the years, made our meeting even more precious. As I sat looking at each of these marvelous men and realized how far each of us have come in our lives and the obstacles we have had to overcome to get to where we are today, my pride swelled.
Right now, I have two brothers living in Myrtle Beach. Another one will be moving down there within a year and then hopefully the fourth will follow soon afterward. I’m hoping for many more “sibling reunions” once we are all gathered in one area. Yes, we are growing closer, but we are also growing older and as we age I realize that our years to enjoy time together are numbered, so I want to savor each moment and honor the fact that we are “family”.
-- Maya Angelou
I love this quote, especially because my brothers and I didn’t grow up together. Due to an alcoholic father, we were scattered about by Social Services, in different homes around our community. We are all four years apart, so our age discrepancies also played a big part in our not feeling close to one another. We were merely “siblings” growing up, but as we age…as we each have passed the 50 year old mark, I find that we are reaching out to each other, in a way we never did before.
I was lucky enough to get to spend time with all four of my brothers this past weekend. We gathered for a cookout, at one of the twins homes, in Myrtle Beach. They seem to know so much more about each other’s lives than I do. It was fun to sit and listen to them reminisce and learn more about the way in which they have grown and changed through the years.
After just losing my job…the closeness of this family reunion warmed my heart and brought me pure joy. The graying hair, the furrowed brows and deep wrinkles, the extra weight we’ve all gained through the years, made our meeting even more precious. As I sat looking at each of these marvelous men and realized how far each of us have come in our lives and the obstacles we have had to overcome to get to where we are today, my pride swelled.
Right now, I have two brothers living in Myrtle Beach. Another one will be moving down there within a year and then hopefully the fourth will follow soon afterward. I’m hoping for many more “sibling reunions” once we are all gathered in one area. Yes, we are growing closer, but we are also growing older and as we age I realize that our years to enjoy time together are numbered, so I want to savor each moment and honor the fact that we are “family”.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
UNEMPLOYED...AGAIN
I’m unemployed again. I was let go from work at noon on Friday. I'm trying to stay upbeat about it...hated the job anyway, they were a bunch of jerks, depressing place to work, I would have looked for something else eventually...but even with all that...it is still such a horrible blow and makes me feel tainted somehow and unworthy. Other than the lay-off I suffered in January 2009, I have never been dismissed from a job.
I wasn’t given any concrete reason. I didn’t steal anything, get on the internet, talk on the phone incessantly, arrive late, go home early, take long three martini lunches…none of that. The only thing they would say was…”you’re just not the right fit.”
When I started, they hadn’t had a permanent Admin for over six months. They advertised this job three times before finally hiring someone…me. I worked so hard at getting everything in that office running like a fine oiled tool and now someone else will reap all those benefits. I was given no training, never told exactly what my duties were or how to implement them. The next person won’t have to suffer as I did because I put together an Office Procedures manual that outlines every little thing that needs to be done and how to do it. I had to research and find out all this information for myself, with no help from the Raleigh office. All my answers I got from the corporate office in Massachusetts.
Even realizing that this company has gone through Office Assistants, like wild fire the past two years, I still took this job and I thought I'd be the "one". Oh well, guess I was the "one", but just another "one". Another one kicked to the curb.
I am really trying not to let this get me down and to push past the feelings of rejection and anger, but it’s a hard pill to swallow. It sure was nice having that paycheck for a few brief weeks. Tightening the purse strings again! Onward and upward…………
I wasn’t given any concrete reason. I didn’t steal anything, get on the internet, talk on the phone incessantly, arrive late, go home early, take long three martini lunches…none of that. The only thing they would say was…”you’re just not the right fit.”
When I started, they hadn’t had a permanent Admin for over six months. They advertised this job three times before finally hiring someone…me. I worked so hard at getting everything in that office running like a fine oiled tool and now someone else will reap all those benefits. I was given no training, never told exactly what my duties were or how to implement them. The next person won’t have to suffer as I did because I put together an Office Procedures manual that outlines every little thing that needs to be done and how to do it. I had to research and find out all this information for myself, with no help from the Raleigh office. All my answers I got from the corporate office in Massachusetts.
Even realizing that this company has gone through Office Assistants, like wild fire the past two years, I still took this job and I thought I'd be the "one". Oh well, guess I was the "one", but just another "one". Another one kicked to the curb.
I am really trying not to let this get me down and to push past the feelings of rejection and anger, but it’s a hard pill to swallow. It sure was nice having that paycheck for a few brief weeks. Tightening the purse strings again! Onward and upward…………
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
TIME TO WRITE AGAIN..........
It’s been a long time since I’ve blogged. I’m working now and I’m so exhausted when I get home that I don’t have the energy to be witty, creative or entertaining. I do miss sharing though and the process of writing always warms my heart, so I’ve decided that I need to “suck it up” and start producing again.
Two of my brothers came for a visit this past weekend. I haven’t seen them for several years. One of them is battling lung cancer and although, to others, he may look strong, I could see the toll this horrible disease is taking on him. He never complained while he was here and kept apologizing for cutting outings short and needing to rest. I was hiding my tears. I admire him so much for the efforts he is making in fighting his way through this.
Both brothers have left and headed to Myrtle Beach to visit with our other two brothers. This weekend I will be heading out to join all of them. My brother with the cancer wanted this reunion. He feels like this might be the last time he’ll get to see all of us. This will be the first time in about 15 years that we have all been together and we weren’t attending a funeral.
Due to circumstances in our upbringing, we are not a close knit group, but we do love each other in our own way. As we all grow older, I find that we seem to be seeking out the solace and the comfort that comes from knowing that you have family out there sharing the world with you. I look forward to seeing everyone and I pray that my brother will win his battle and that we will soon have another gathering celebrating him being cancer free.
Two of my brothers came for a visit this past weekend. I haven’t seen them for several years. One of them is battling lung cancer and although, to others, he may look strong, I could see the toll this horrible disease is taking on him. He never complained while he was here and kept apologizing for cutting outings short and needing to rest. I was hiding my tears. I admire him so much for the efforts he is making in fighting his way through this.
Both brothers have left and headed to Myrtle Beach to visit with our other two brothers. This weekend I will be heading out to join all of them. My brother with the cancer wanted this reunion. He feels like this might be the last time he’ll get to see all of us. This will be the first time in about 15 years that we have all been together and we weren’t attending a funeral.
Due to circumstances in our upbringing, we are not a close knit group, but we do love each other in our own way. As we all grow older, I find that we seem to be seeking out the solace and the comfort that comes from knowing that you have family out there sharing the world with you. I look forward to seeing everyone and I pray that my brother will win his battle and that we will soon have another gathering celebrating him being cancer free.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
A sore throat...really? Four days before starting a new job I wake up with a swollen gland and sore throat. Is this God's idea of a joke? After 18 months of being unemployed...I will NOT start my new job sick.
I am armed with orange juice, Vitamin C pills and Vicks. I rub the Vicks on my throat, wrap it with a towel and it usually will take care of that sore gland in one day. If I'm not 100% tomorrow, it's off to the doctor's office!
Gonna brew a cup of tea, get the Vicks spread on me and take it easy today!
I am armed with orange juice, Vitamin C pills and Vicks. I rub the Vicks on my throat, wrap it with a towel and it usually will take care of that sore gland in one day. If I'm not 100% tomorrow, it's off to the doctor's office!
Gonna brew a cup of tea, get the Vicks spread on me and take it easy today!
Monday, July 5, 2010
NO LONGER UNEMPLOYED
I got a job! After eighteen months of looking, and patiently waiting till I found a position that paid close to what I was receiving when I was laid-off from my last job...I have finally been rewarded. Couldn't have come at a better time either. My husband needs to find another place to work and this will give him a chance to do just that. He can take a little less in salary now in order to get his foot in the door somewhere new.
I'm looking forward to getting started. It's nice to know that I will wake up each day with a specific purpose. I will be able to help a business be a success. Weekends will take on a whole new meaning...not just be another day. Holidays will be looked forward to. Vacation...will actually BE a vacation.
It's a tough market out there, but if you are persistent, don't settle (unless you absolutely have to), you will find something!
I've got one more week before I start. I'll enjoy every minute of it and hit the ground running on Monday, July 12th!
I'm looking forward to getting started. It's nice to know that I will wake up each day with a specific purpose. I will be able to help a business be a success. Weekends will take on a whole new meaning...not just be another day. Holidays will be looked forward to. Vacation...will actually BE a vacation.
It's a tough market out there, but if you are persistent, don't settle (unless you absolutely have to), you will find something!
I've got one more week before I start. I'll enjoy every minute of it and hit the ground running on Monday, July 12th!
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
THE CAT'S AWAY.......
While the cat's away...this mouse is gonna play. I put my hubby on a plane, bound for Chicago, this morning. He spends four to five days, each year, with three of his guy buddies from his high school days. This is my time to spend four to five days, doing whatever I jolly well please.
During this time I don't make the bed, do laundry, cook meals, run the vacuum or pick up around the house. I make plans to spend time with my friends or go to the beach or catch up on my "chic flics".
Ladies, if your husband doesn't "disappear" for a few days each year...I thoroughly recommend that you try to get him to do so. This is such a time of re-energizing for me. It gives me a chance to miss him and appreciate him. When he comes home it's always great to see him again and we have stories to tell each other about our time apart. Conversation is possible again.
I hate that, this year, their gathering takes place over the Fourth of July weekend, but I've gotten an invitation to party with friends, so I'll be enjoying myself. It's only 8:00a.m., but I think I'll grab another cup of coffee and watch "Valentine's Day." Ahhhh, woman time!
During this time I don't make the bed, do laundry, cook meals, run the vacuum or pick up around the house. I make plans to spend time with my friends or go to the beach or catch up on my "chic flics".
Ladies, if your husband doesn't "disappear" for a few days each year...I thoroughly recommend that you try to get him to do so. This is such a time of re-energizing for me. It gives me a chance to miss him and appreciate him. When he comes home it's always great to see him again and we have stories to tell each other about our time apart. Conversation is possible again.
I hate that, this year, their gathering takes place over the Fourth of July weekend, but I've gotten an invitation to party with friends, so I'll be enjoying myself. It's only 8:00a.m., but I think I'll grab another cup of coffee and watch "Valentine's Day." Ahhhh, woman time!
Monday, June 28, 2010
MAH JONG SUNDAY
I played Mah Jong with a group of my girlfriends yesterday. It's only my second time playing, but I have to say...I really enjoy it. It's a little rough learning all the rules, but once you do it's a lot of fun. The ladies' I play with are very patient teaching all the newbies.
Mah Jong is played with tiles. You can buy them in different sizes. I prefer the bigger ones, cause at my age they're easier to see. There are different "suits", like in cards. Bamboo, Circles, Characters, Winds, Dragons and the all important "honor" tiles. The object is to make 3 or 4 of a kind. There's a lot of strategy involved, but once you start playing it's pretty easy to catch on.Four people is the ideal number to play, but we played one round with only three.
The hardest part of playing Mah Jong is the scoring. Even this becomes fairly routine, though, after you do it once or twice.
If you're looking for a game that is challenging, but fun, at the same time...give Mah Jong a try.
Mah Jong is played with tiles. You can buy them in different sizes. I prefer the bigger ones, cause at my age they're easier to see. There are different "suits", like in cards. Bamboo, Circles, Characters, Winds, Dragons and the all important "honor" tiles. The object is to make 3 or 4 of a kind. There's a lot of strategy involved, but once you start playing it's pretty easy to catch on.Four people is the ideal number to play, but we played one round with only three.
The hardest part of playing Mah Jong is the scoring. Even this becomes fairly routine, though, after you do it once or twice.
If you're looking for a game that is challenging, but fun, at the same time...give Mah Jong a try.
Friday, June 25, 2010
WORKAHOLIC SPOUSES
Do you ever wonder if you're really married or not? Do you ever look at the person who walks in the door in the evening and wonder, "who is this stranger?" My husband's presence in our home is becoming surreal to me. He is working such long ridiculous hours, that we barely get a chance to speak. When he is home...he's not HOME. He always has this glazed look in his eyes, and I know he's thinking about what needs to be done the next day at work or the World Cup.
Wednesday he finally had a day off, but because he really needed a chance to just unwind and relax, instead of giving him a "honey-do" list, I sent him off with our neighbor to play golf. They were gone...all day! I whisked him out to dinner as soon as he came home, thinking we'd then have some special "us" time. We ended up at a place where the TV's spew sports channels all day and night, so conversation was limited, to say the least.
Last night he closed the store. He got home around 11:00p.m. I'd already gone to bed and was watching HGTV. When he turned the handle and walked into the room, I was just drifting off to sleep and I jerked awake thinking, "who is this man?" It's a good thing I don't sleep with a gun under my pillow!
He came over, leaned down to give me a kiss and as I was drifting back to sleep, I thought, "oh yeah, I know him...and I miss him."
Wednesday he finally had a day off, but because he really needed a chance to just unwind and relax, instead of giving him a "honey-do" list, I sent him off with our neighbor to play golf. They were gone...all day! I whisked him out to dinner as soon as he came home, thinking we'd then have some special "us" time. We ended up at a place where the TV's spew sports channels all day and night, so conversation was limited, to say the least.
Last night he closed the store. He got home around 11:00p.m. I'd already gone to bed and was watching HGTV. When he turned the handle and walked into the room, I was just drifting off to sleep and I jerked awake thinking, "who is this man?" It's a good thing I don't sleep with a gun under my pillow!
He came over, leaned down to give me a kiss and as I was drifting back to sleep, I thought, "oh yeah, I know him...and I miss him."
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
DR. McYUMMY
My incision bandages have been officially removed and everything looks great! I'm so glad to have this behind me now. Well, sort of. I'm gonna miss my doctor. Even though I only saw him for about 30 minutes, when the surgery was scheduled, and then again today, for about 15 minutes, for my post-op visit, I've got a surgeon-crush.
He's not your typical tall, dark and handsome. In fact, he's average height, white haired with a big ole mustache, but he tickles my fancy. He's got a great sense of humor and I have that on my list of prerequisites, for doctor's who are gonna dig around and remove organs from inside my body.
I'm thrilled that I no longer have my belly button taped closed, but it was with a deep sigh and little wave that I said, "good-bye" to Dr. Powell and left his office today. If you ever need a surgical procedure of any kind and wanna little over 50 eye-candy...he's your man! Of course different strokes, for different folks, but I like that long haired, scruffy, deep manly laughing sort of guy.
Okay, enough.............I'm HEALED and that's what's really important...isn't it?
He's not your typical tall, dark and handsome. In fact, he's average height, white haired with a big ole mustache, but he tickles my fancy. He's got a great sense of humor and I have that on my list of prerequisites, for doctor's who are gonna dig around and remove organs from inside my body.
I'm thrilled that I no longer have my belly button taped closed, but it was with a deep sigh and little wave that I said, "good-bye" to Dr. Powell and left his office today. If you ever need a surgical procedure of any kind and wanna little over 50 eye-candy...he's your man! Of course different strokes, for different folks, but I like that long haired, scruffy, deep manly laughing sort of guy.
Okay, enough.............I'm HEALED and that's what's really important...isn't it?
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
BABY GOT BACK...BONE
Reba McEntire once said, “To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone.”
I sure have that wishbone part down pat and I throw a little funny bone into every day. It’s the backbone that I find confusing. I’m not sure how much backbone I’m supposed to have. Is it okay to just let things slide, even if they make you uncomfortable? Is shouting your opinions from the rooftops louder than everyone else considered having a backbone? If I don’t call people on the carpet every time I disagree with them…do I lack a backbone? Does everything in life have to be on my terms only and should I fight to be sure they are…in order to have a backbone?
I like to think I have a backbone where it counts. I don’t let anyone walk all over the people I love. I believe that’s where a backbone is really necessary. As for me personally, well I choose my battles.
I’ve always been a rather peaceful, laid-back person and therefore have probably been run over many times by loud, obnoxious, opinionated individuals…but the funny part is…I can’t remember any of these incidents, so how important were they? When I do tap into my backbone it surprises people. Such as the other night when my drunken brother called me and decided to rake me over the coals for something I’d never even done. I hung up on him; but not before I used very flowery language to tell him what he could do with his rantings. Shocked the heck out of him and out of me. I think he actually respected me more for not taking his crap.
Baby got backbone, when she needs it. I just don’t feel that I have to yell to get my point across. I’m right…nuff said…you can rage all you want. I’m gonna take a nap.
I sure have that wishbone part down pat and I throw a little funny bone into every day. It’s the backbone that I find confusing. I’m not sure how much backbone I’m supposed to have. Is it okay to just let things slide, even if they make you uncomfortable? Is shouting your opinions from the rooftops louder than everyone else considered having a backbone? If I don’t call people on the carpet every time I disagree with them…do I lack a backbone? Does everything in life have to be on my terms only and should I fight to be sure they are…in order to have a backbone?
I like to think I have a backbone where it counts. I don’t let anyone walk all over the people I love. I believe that’s where a backbone is really necessary. As for me personally, well I choose my battles.
I’ve always been a rather peaceful, laid-back person and therefore have probably been run over many times by loud, obnoxious, opinionated individuals…but the funny part is…I can’t remember any of these incidents, so how important were they? When I do tap into my backbone it surprises people. Such as the other night when my drunken brother called me and decided to rake me over the coals for something I’d never even done. I hung up on him; but not before I used very flowery language to tell him what he could do with his rantings. Shocked the heck out of him and out of me. I think he actually respected me more for not taking his crap.
Baby got backbone, when she needs it. I just don’t feel that I have to yell to get my point across. I’m right…nuff said…you can rage all you want. I’m gonna take a nap.
Monday, June 21, 2010
FRIENDS HELPING FRIENDS........
I had my "heart-light" turned on today, thanks to the help of a new friend.Sandra Carrington-Smith, is an author, who lives here in Raleigh. I met her a couple of months ago at a freelancers meeting I was attending and instantly liked her. We had lunch together today and she is just an absolute fountain of information, and the nice thing is...she's an author willing to share her knowledge.
So many published authors don't want to talk to other writers. They will snub you. Unless, of course, you want to discuss them and their success. Then you can bet they will drown you with more information than you really wanted, and some how in that process manage to keep pertinent data, which might assist you in your career...to themselves.
Sandra isn't one of those authors. She is funny, warm, inviting and happy to help, especially, if she sees potential in you as a writer. She WANTS you to succeed, just as she has. Her novel, The Book of Obeah, is now out in bookstores and I thoroughly recommend it to anyone who likes a page turner.
I know that Sandra and I have forged a lasting friendship. One that will see us both through lots of book publishing parties and signings. Thanks Sandra, for all you've done to make me realize my self-worth as a writer. You are a true friend!
So many published authors don't want to talk to other writers. They will snub you. Unless, of course, you want to discuss them and their success. Then you can bet they will drown you with more information than you really wanted, and some how in that process manage to keep pertinent data, which might assist you in your career...to themselves.
Sandra isn't one of those authors. She is funny, warm, inviting and happy to help, especially, if she sees potential in you as a writer. She WANTS you to succeed, just as she has. Her novel, The Book of Obeah, is now out in bookstores and I thoroughly recommend it to anyone who likes a page turner.
I know that Sandra and I have forged a lasting friendship. One that will see us both through lots of book publishing parties and signings. Thanks Sandra, for all you've done to make me realize my self-worth as a writer. You are a true friend!
Friday, June 18, 2010
RE-ENTERING WORK FORCE HELL
I must soon join the work force again. In January 2009 I was laid-off, after seven years of working for the same company. Seven years was a record for me and I was really devastated when they let me go. Okay, honestly, I was depressed and crushed.
I spent the first three months of freedom wallowing in my own self-pity and feeling sorry for myself. Then I saw an opportunity. I was receiving unemployment benefits and decided to resurrect my writing talents. Happiness reined in our home again. I spent hours a day completing a novel I started over twenty years ago. I started blogging. I wrote poetry, short stories, children stories, magazine articles, whatever struck my fancy. After six months of just enjoying the creative process of penning prose, I decided I should actually try to make some money at this past time. After all, the government wasn't going to pay me forever to stay home, so I needed to earn some cash from my literary productions in order to seriously consider it as my new "career."
SCRRREEEECCCCHHHH, this is where my writing dream seemed to stall out. Although I truly relish typing away and telling tales, breaking into that "paid" author group is tough!
I still kept struggling though, till this week. This week my unemployment stopped coming in every Tuesday. I won't miss the sound of that lady's voice on the phone every Monday as I call in to register, but I will miss the money that allowed me to follow a dream...for at least a while.
I am now officially, honestly and sincerely looking to re-enter the 8-5 work force. I am determined not to let my dream die along with having to become a drone for 40 hours per week, but bills don't stop coming just because your income does. So, unfortunately, its' "hi-ho, hi-ho, it's off to work I go"...as soon as I can get hired that is.
I spent the first three months of freedom wallowing in my own self-pity and feeling sorry for myself. Then I saw an opportunity. I was receiving unemployment benefits and decided to resurrect my writing talents. Happiness reined in our home again. I spent hours a day completing a novel I started over twenty years ago. I started blogging. I wrote poetry, short stories, children stories, magazine articles, whatever struck my fancy. After six months of just enjoying the creative process of penning prose, I decided I should actually try to make some money at this past time. After all, the government wasn't going to pay me forever to stay home, so I needed to earn some cash from my literary productions in order to seriously consider it as my new "career."
SCRRREEEECCCCHHHH, this is where my writing dream seemed to stall out. Although I truly relish typing away and telling tales, breaking into that "paid" author group is tough!
I still kept struggling though, till this week. This week my unemployment stopped coming in every Tuesday. I won't miss the sound of that lady's voice on the phone every Monday as I call in to register, but I will miss the money that allowed me to follow a dream...for at least a while.
I am now officially, honestly and sincerely looking to re-enter the 8-5 work force. I am determined not to let my dream die along with having to become a drone for 40 hours per week, but bills don't stop coming just because your income does. So, unfortunately, its' "hi-ho, hi-ho, it's off to work I go"...as soon as I can get hired that is.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
I DON'T WANNA GROW UP
I was watching America's Got Talent last night. Definitely not one of my favorite shows, but I love Howie Mandel and he is a judge this season (say "good-bye" to the Hoff).
Howie has this amazing ability to really LOVE life. He always has this wondrous expression on his face, like he's seeing or hearing something for the first time and he finds it interesting and amusing. The other two judges are very quick to hit their "stop" buttons, but Howie sits and stares with amusement and sometimes laughs outloud at what we think are those mundane or ridiculous acts. He is truly entertained.
I used to view life this way. I found amusement and a chuckle in so many of the things in my life and the world around me. I observed more. I slowed down and took more time to look around me. I believe I enjoyed more.
Some people might say, "well you've grown up," and they are probably right, but it sucks. I don't want to be a grownup if it means I can't find wonder and joy in the little things or the absurd things happening around me. When did I become so cynical and judgmental.
When I was working every day I used to look for something humorous or interesting on my way to work. It could be a billboard, a business sign, a person at the bus stop, a crazy looking vehicle or someone walking down the road. Sometimes I would share what I'd seen with my fellow co-workers, but always I would have that image to look back at and smile throughout the day. It's a great way to start your day. Try it...you may like it.
As for me...I'm gonna get back on that "Peter Pan" train and appreciate the silly again!
Howie has this amazing ability to really LOVE life. He always has this wondrous expression on his face, like he's seeing or hearing something for the first time and he finds it interesting and amusing. The other two judges are very quick to hit their "stop" buttons, but Howie sits and stares with amusement and sometimes laughs outloud at what we think are those mundane or ridiculous acts. He is truly entertained.
I used to view life this way. I found amusement and a chuckle in so many of the things in my life and the world around me. I observed more. I slowed down and took more time to look around me. I believe I enjoyed more.
Some people might say, "well you've grown up," and they are probably right, but it sucks. I don't want to be a grownup if it means I can't find wonder and joy in the little things or the absurd things happening around me. When did I become so cynical and judgmental.
When I was working every day I used to look for something humorous or interesting on my way to work. It could be a billboard, a business sign, a person at the bus stop, a crazy looking vehicle or someone walking down the road. Sometimes I would share what I'd seen with my fellow co-workers, but always I would have that image to look back at and smile throughout the day. It's a great way to start your day. Try it...you may like it.
As for me...I'm gonna get back on that "Peter Pan" train and appreciate the silly again!
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
"OW" AND I SAY THAT WITH FEELING
Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry alone. Of course, if you have just recently had surgery...I suggest you do neither. Don't laugh, cry, burp, bend over or try to move the 50 lb. coffeetable. Cause it won't feel good. Any of it. Trust me on this!
I've actually been avoiding comedies since my surgery. I miss laughing, but the absence of pain is worth the absence of giggles! I don't even want to talk to my funny friends and I really need my comedic husband to stop with the wisecracks that make me clutch my belly in agony as my body shakes with laughter. Is he funnier now that I don't want him to be or was he always like this?
Tragedies and drama is another form of entertainment I'm trying to avoid. I'm a crier. I cry over sappy commercials. I can just fast forward through those though, as 90% of all our TV viewing is done via DVR. I was grabbing my belly and the tissues simultaneously as I watched the finale of GLEE Friday night. These kind of shows must be shunned for at least another week.
This leaves action shows only as a possible outlet. Of course even those need to be monitored. Don't want to watch any "gut wrenching" scenes. Stress can cause my stomach muscles to contract.
Oh hell, maybe I'll just read. No funny books though or tear jerkers. Hmmm, just staring off into space is always an option!
I've actually been avoiding comedies since my surgery. I miss laughing, but the absence of pain is worth the absence of giggles! I don't even want to talk to my funny friends and I really need my comedic husband to stop with the wisecracks that make me clutch my belly in agony as my body shakes with laughter. Is he funnier now that I don't want him to be or was he always like this?
Tragedies and drama is another form of entertainment I'm trying to avoid. I'm a crier. I cry over sappy commercials. I can just fast forward through those though, as 90% of all our TV viewing is done via DVR. I was grabbing my belly and the tissues simultaneously as I watched the finale of GLEE Friday night. These kind of shows must be shunned for at least another week.
This leaves action shows only as a possible outlet. Of course even those need to be monitored. Don't want to watch any "gut wrenching" scenes. Stress can cause my stomach muscles to contract.
Oh hell, maybe I'll just read. No funny books though or tear jerkers. Hmmm, just staring off into space is always an option!
Saturday, June 12, 2010
NOT ON MY LIST OF FAVORITES
Surgery of any kind if NOT going on my list of favorite things. I can't believe that people have been back to work two days after having their gallbladders removed. I feel like such a wimp, but I can barely straighten up. Today I get to take a shower though, so maybe I'll feel better after that.
I've had so many wonderful friends wishing me well. One of them even brought food...which my family really appreciated. They better make it last a few more days cause I don't intend to be at the stove again till at least Monday.
Just posting a quick note to let everyone know...I made it through, I'm sore as hell and I'd like to say, "I'm not taking this laying down"...but the truth is...I AM!
I've had so many wonderful friends wishing me well. One of them even brought food...which my family really appreciated. They better make it last a few more days cause I don't intend to be at the stove again till at least Monday.
Just posting a quick note to let everyone know...I made it through, I'm sore as hell and I'd like to say, "I'm not taking this laying down"...but the truth is...I AM!
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
POST SURGERY BUCKET LIST
Tomorrow is the BIG day. I go "under the knife" for the first time ever. In celebration of that occasion I decided it was high time I made a bucket list. I figure if I have a list of things to do then everything will have to go smoothly so I can accomplish my set purpose in the universe. Besides, I ain't getting any younger, although I have to say I don't feel as old as that face in the mirror looks.
I'm not sure what normal people (I know I don't belong to this crowd) put on their bucket lists. Probably things like traveling to exotic places, eating strange and weird foods, apologizing for wrongs they've committed or finding old family members or friends, giving back to the world somehow. Yeah, that's not for me.
Just a few items on my bucket list: (1)learn pole-dancing...this one's for my hubby really, although pole dancing is good exercise, (2)visit the sky diving simulator...this is as close as I will ever get to jumping out of a plane,(3) grow an herb garden and try to keep it alive for at least six months, (4)get at least one thing published...even if it's just a letter to the editor in the Nfreakin'O, (5)create a piece of art for our home...painting, sculpture, playdough animal...something artsy, fartsy I can point to and say, "I created that"(6)finally get all my pictures organized in albums...I may die before I finish this, (7)get one of those water massages they give at the mall and maybe even get my teeth whitened and eyebrows threaded at the same mall...the same day (8)climb a rock wall...this one is a lot like work, so I'm putting it on the bottom of my list.
I'm sure I'll be adding to my list as things occur to me...but for now...I need to take a nap, so I'll be ready to tackle these projects...post surgery.
I'm not sure what normal people (I know I don't belong to this crowd) put on their bucket lists. Probably things like traveling to exotic places, eating strange and weird foods, apologizing for wrongs they've committed or finding old family members or friends, giving back to the world somehow. Yeah, that's not for me.
Just a few items on my bucket list: (1)learn pole-dancing...this one's for my hubby really, although pole dancing is good exercise, (2)visit the sky diving simulator...this is as close as I will ever get to jumping out of a plane,(3) grow an herb garden and try to keep it alive for at least six months, (4)get at least one thing published...even if it's just a letter to the editor in the Nfreakin'O, (5)create a piece of art for our home...painting, sculpture, playdough animal...something artsy, fartsy I can point to and say, "I created that"(6)finally get all my pictures organized in albums...I may die before I finish this, (7)get one of those water massages they give at the mall and maybe even get my teeth whitened and eyebrows threaded at the same mall...the same day (8)climb a rock wall...this one is a lot like work, so I'm putting it on the bottom of my list.
I'm sure I'll be adding to my list as things occur to me...but for now...I need to take a nap, so I'll be ready to tackle these projects...post surgery.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
STEP ASIDE BIG...COLOSSAL HAS ARRIVED
This blog is the product of a direct challenge from my husband. He saw a show the other night about squid...the gigantic versus the colossal squid to be exact. He's now somewhat obsessed with the word "colossal" and dared me to blog about his new favorite word. So here goes sweetie......
Have you noticed that our food...especially snack foods are getting smaller, while our mascara keeps getting bigger? It's all psychological bull crap, but the manufacturers for our cookies, crackers, etc. think if they make them smaller we will think if we are consuming less calories. Nahhhhh, we're just gonna eat twice as many of those little suckers! The manufacturers of mascara on the other hand want us to think huge and instead of having "gigantic" lashes (which paints kind of a gross picture I think) we now can have "colossal" lashes (thank you Maybelline).
The definition of gigantic is: very large; huge. The definition of colossal is: Extraordinarily great in size, extent or degree. Colossal even has a cooler sounding definition doesn't it.
Years ago we were happy with the word big...then large...huge...on to gigantic and now colossal! Let's all jump on board the colossal train. Use it in a sentence at least once today. It'll make you smile I guarantee it!
Have you noticed that our food...especially snack foods are getting smaller, while our mascara keeps getting bigger? It's all psychological bull crap, but the manufacturers for our cookies, crackers, etc. think if they make them smaller we will think if we are consuming less calories. Nahhhhh, we're just gonna eat twice as many of those little suckers! The manufacturers of mascara on the other hand want us to think huge and instead of having "gigantic" lashes (which paints kind of a gross picture I think) we now can have "colossal" lashes (thank you Maybelline).
The definition of gigantic is: very large; huge. The definition of colossal is: Extraordinarily great in size, extent or degree. Colossal even has a cooler sounding definition doesn't it.
Years ago we were happy with the word big...then large...huge...on to gigantic and now colossal! Let's all jump on board the colossal train. Use it in a sentence at least once today. It'll make you smile I guarantee it!
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