I WANT IT MY WAY

I can really be a pain-in-the-ass when I go out to eat. I've seen waiters and waitresses, I've had in the past, slip a ten or twenty to the hostess, when they see me arrive, so I won't be seated in their area.

I'm Sally, from When Harry Met Sally..."on the side please". I'm Burger King, "have it my way". I just want, what I want and how I want it. After all if I'm paying for it shouldn't it be something I'll enjoy? Don't get me wrong. I'm not uppity or sticking it to the wait staff just for laughs. I'm always polite. Hell, I even smile, but I still want things served in certain ways.

It always starts with my drink. I like LOTS of ice. And when I mean LOTS of ice, I mean like an ice cap or massive glacier formed in my glass. I always want lemon too. When my drink arrives...that's the first clue on whether this waiter or waitress is going to get a good tip.

Salad dressings should always be 'on the side', hot foods--hot and cold foods--cold. If I order meat well-done, then I don't want to see a hint of pink. If I want wilted salad, I'll eat at home with greens from a plastic bag. Hold the sauce, go light on the sauce, sauce on the side...I'm never sure which way I'll go, but I like the server to be able to keep up.

I don't believe a tip is a given. I always tip according to service. The nice thing is for all the waiters and waitresses out there who might stumble across this blog...if you are polite, smile and are even fun...then you can screw up my order over and over and I will still be leaving you a good tip. If you are rude, grouchy, sullen or a drag, then even serving everything perfect won't get ya a decent tip.

I'm going out to lunch today. Maybe I should take a copy of this blog along with me. NAH, let's just play waiter roulette and see what happens!